Meet Olivia Pham, LMFT, PMH-C
You’re tired of not being the mom you hoped and dreamed you’d be.
You might want to be, or are actually curled up in bed so worried and overwhelmed with the covers over your face. You want to become the best version of yourself for your kids. You know you’ve got to start working on yourself so your kids don’t have the same hang-ups that you’re struggling with right now. You’re ready to start shaking things up and making change, knowing that it’s scary and difficult. You’re here. You made that first step. You’ve come to the right place. My hope is that as you move through therapy you can get on your feet and feel powerful, capable, and thriving!
You can become comfortable in your role as mom.
You might have never been to therapy before, or you’re curious about what is different about the way I engage in therapy.
Let’s start with the basics of who I am as a person.
I am an authentic, here for you therapist, that loves a good laugh. I want to hear what’s going on when you start to believe that you’re not good enough or that you can’t be your kids’ mom. I am here to hear your frustrations and fears. Whether you’re yelling or crying, I am here to hold that flood of emotions that motherhood brings. You deserve a dedicated space and time where you can feel safe to share your deepest fears, and ‘cry it out’ but with your exhaustion and overwhelm. I give you space to feel the rage and sadness, then help you pick up the pieces and make a new puzzle. We figure out what you need in those moments and find some solutions.
I enjoy having fun in sessions and making them life-giving in some way. I love to laugh and find humor during our time, and even throw in a cuss word or two to drive a point home. The best sessions are relaxed and casual. I am the thought-provoker and cheerleader. I push you to do the uncomfortable to make the change you want.
Next, let’s discuss how I see you.
I have a Masters in Marriage and Family Therapy, which helped me build a foundation for how I think about you and the difficulties you’re experiencing. You may be the only person coming into the session, but with this view, I am also thinking about the way you are interacting with and impacted by your family, friends, community, and our society as a whole. You probably don’t go home to an empty house and interact with no one until you see me next. You are never JUST yourself. The people you interact with and the way you interact with them impact you. The way this translates into our work together is when you bring a difficult situation to therapy, I am thinking about how your environment impacted you and how you impacted your environment.
We can also use this family view with how change happens. The general goal of therapy is for you to make some tweaks in your life to create change. When you start making small changes in the way you talk with your family or deal with stress, they will notice. Change can be difficult and uncomfortable. They may struggle with the changes you make at first, just like you may struggle with those changes. Y’all are so used to communicating and existing in this one way for who knows how long. We can’t expect your change to be perfect 100% of the time, nor can we expect others to be okay with your change 100% of the time. But over time, your changes might have a ripple effect through the whole house and things can get easier.
I also believe that not one single person is responsible for the issues in a family. This is a hard truth to swallow, but generally, problems exist because of the way we interact with each other. Each person in the family reacts differently to the problem and unfortunately helps the problem continue. This comes into play when we start talking about an issue and I begin to wonder how you reacted to the problem at hand and what feelings you had. I often think about the way you communicate with yourself and your family, as well as the overall relationships you have with your family members.
How Do I Work to Help You Change?
The next aspect I bring into therapy sessions is my approach to your struggles.
I typically use Solution-Focused Brief Therapy (SFBT). There are situations where I use a different theory or approach, like when we process trauma. But generally speaking, I use Solution-Focused Brief Therapy to help you achieve your therapy goals. I love this approach because I get to be your cheerleader each week as we discuss what went well and what needs improvement. This approach encourages forward movement and empowers you to make positive changes in your life.
It may sound a little crazy, but SFBT believes that you have the ability to make the changes you want to see happen and that you’re likely already doing some little things to make that change a reality. Exhibit A: You’re here, doing your homework on starting therapy!
Through talking about the problems and struggles that bring you to therapy, we land on what you want to change and how you want your life to look. You may want to loose your cool less on your kids. You want to feel like the awesome mom that everyone tells you that you are. You want to feel less alone in your relationships. You want to help your kids grow up to be a little bit better than you, just like you’re trying to be a little bit better than your parents. You want things to be different. You may not yet know what that ‘different’ is, but together we can figure that out.
Or, you know what you want to change but it freaks you out. Change can be so scary and is one of the hardest things you accomplish in life. It can be overwhelming. If you know what needs to be done to reach your goals, but are scared about taking that step, we can talk about this! If this is you, it sounds like you’ve done so much work to get to this point already. We can weigh the pros and cons of changing together. We can think about what life would be like if you made that change. Would you feel more confident? Would you feel more calm?
You have the strength to start this therapy journey. You have the strength to be the best mom ever for your kids. Think of all the difficult and trying experiences you’ve endured already. I’m here to help you think and talk about those fears and worries about change in therapy. It’s so awesome to see who you become when a few months down the road, you’re not as agitated with your kids. You’re able to talk to your partner about what you need to feel more supported. And you’re able to feel happy in your family.
But you want to know who I am.
So you want to know just a little bit more about me and why I became a therapist for moms? Becoming a therapist came before becoming a therapist for moms.
I knew since I was a child that I always wanted to help people, but I wasn’t sure how I would do that. I went through all the medical and dental professions before landing in nutrition as I entered my undergraduate studies at Texas Tech.
I absolutely loved nutrition, and I believe that’s where my holistic view of health began. Then, I was in the typical general psychology course and it clicked. Everything I was learning was exciting and interesting. I thought, I can help people heal and change without fainting at the sight of blood everyday or struggling through another chemistry course. I found my calling and purpose in life.
So, I got my Masters in Marriage and Family Therapy at Abilene Christian University and began my career working with kids who have experienced or witnessed trauma. I learned so much about trauma and the way it manifests in the body and mind. It’s a very individualized experience, from how you work through traumatic events to how you experience it in your body, mind, and heart.
I love being able to bring my work with trauma and kids (separately and together) into my work with moms. You may have experienced trauma years ago unrelated to your family now. You may have not processed a birth trauma. I am here to hold space for you to process and help you heal. Together, we can carefully process the traumatic events through various therapy approaches created for trauma.
Now, becoming a therapist for moms came with my own experience into motherhood. I had a wild entrance into becoming a mom, as my child had a wild entrance to the world. We’ve experienced quite a few challenges along with the beautiful moments.
My experience into motherhood helped me see that being specialized in the struggles that we go through as parents can help so many people struggling in this stage of life. It’s not an easy chapter that we’re creating. Sometimes, I think becoming a parent is one of the hardest things you do in life. It has the power to absolutely rock your world. And sometimes you don’t fully and completely understand it until you’ve been in the vortex.
I hold the Perinatal Mental Health Certification (PMH-C) by Postpartum Support International. This means I have specialized training to help you through preconception, pregnancy, and postpartum ups and downs that are so common. Postpartum is not just the first year after you give birth. I believe it’s the rest of your life.
Finding a therapist can be overwhelming, but I hope this has helped you learn more about the way I see the world and how I can help you. I’d love to talk more and answer any questions you might have.
I absolutely love getting to help women feel more comfortable with experiencing their emotions, while also helping you become the mom you want to be. I’d be honored to help you feel happy again and enjoy this season of raising your littles.
You are fully capable of making the changes to meet your goals and I can’t wait to help you get there. What would happen if you put yourself first in this moment to better take care of your family? Let’s see what can happen.
A random little tidbit about me is my favorite noun.
Confidence
To me, this looks like you waking up in the morning knowing that you can handle the day. You’ve got a routine that works for you and your family and you’re feeling like Super Mom. You know that you will still have some moments of worry, but you’re able to cope and recover pretty quickly. You are able to set the boundaries you need to in life. And, you have the willingness to be vulnerable and say the things that scare you so your relationships succeed. You believe to your core that you can do this.
My Values
belonging
You belong here. You belong with your people. When we go through challenging times, we often feel alone. The journey to parenthood is no different. It is isolating and the really dark feelings and thoughts are never discussed. There are so many women going through a similar experience. This is why I started my practice and work with you. I felt alone and scared in my transition to motherhood. You deserve more! I want you to feel less alone in your struggles.
expressiveness
You need a space to come and not be judged. My favorite sessions are when we belly laugh, yell, and cry all in one hour. We talk about difficult and deep stuff. I want you to let those emotions out as they come so you can walk away from the computer feeling refreshed and ready to make those difficult changes. All the emotions you think you’re not supposed to feel are fully accepted in my corner of the internet.
collaboration
I believe in collaboration at my core. I love it when my providers collaborate for my best care all around. I want to do the same for you. First, it’s important you and I work as a team. Yes, I have the expensive piece of paper and experience in this work, but you have the experience in your life. You know you better than I know you. If something doesn’t feel right or you know a suggestion won’t work, tell me! I’m all ears to how I can improve to give you the results you deserve.
It’s also important to me to get to know your care providers so we can work together as a team with you and for you. I love meeting the people you trust professionally and how we can help you in the best ways possible.
confidence
My goal for you is to end therapy feeling confident and comfortable in your life. You feel happy again, feeling more like yourself. You can handle difficult situations better than you could before. You’re able to enjoy life without pressure.